Art World Undercover #5: Art Basel Miami Beach (Day Three), by Adam Lehrer
In his final day at Art Basel, Adam drops acid, heads to NADA art fair, infiltrates Soho House, and soaks in the vibes with friends
I sleep until about 8 AM and likely was grinding my teeth throughout the night because I don’t feel rested. I’m done with Art Basel, and instead plan on crossing the bay north to Ice Palace FIlm Studios where NADA, or the New Art Dealers Alliance, is hosting a coinciding fair with more of a focus on emerging galleries. This calms me some. Not because I expect to see art of a better quality, though it’s possible that I could, but more because it’s likely that I’ll run into friends and familiar faces. People who know my intentions and don’t judge me for them. People who support me in my noble mission. And those who oppose me, too.
I skip the workout and eat breakfast with my wife at the hotel. Oatmeal, coffee and fruit. Lousy. Unappetizing. Upstairs, a shower and a change into Nike short shorts and a Safety Propaganda t-shirt. I take a Lyft across the bay north.
I arrive at NADA at 10:30. A line is formed at the gate and it’s not until I ask about press access that the security guard points me away and everyone realizes that we are waiting at the wrong fucking entrance. You might think someone working the fair would have the manners to clue in the fair’s attendees, but do you really think that? Courtesy died in the ‘90s, when President Bill stuck his cock in Monica’s mouth and the press decided it was all news that had to be reported every second of every day. The cum on the dress. Bill had trouble cumming. Monica’s weight. Monica’s fellatio skills. Hilary made a hero for humiliating a 20-year-old girl. But I digress…